Thursday, February 23, 2012

I'm back! (probably!)

Well now, I just went and dropped off the face of the earth didn't I? I blame the bar for most of it, but let's take a quick look at the rest of it, shall we? To the bullets!

May
  • Graduated from law school
  • Was excited and proud and happy for about a day
  • Packed everything I own and shoved what I could fit into the tiniest U-Haul we could get and moved to Oklahoma.
  • Collapsed
June
  • Realized I had to take the bar in less than 2 months and freaked out
  • Decided briefly that hiding from the bar and pretending it wasn't going to really happen was a sound strategy
  • Took a practice test and realized actually studying may be a better strategy
  • Studied. A lot.
  • Turned 24
  • Studied some more
July
  • Studied some more
  • Swore at myself for not being a better student in law school
  • Cried
  • Crammed
  • Gained 15 lbs
  • Took the bar
August
  • Decided to pretend that taking the bar never happened and I wasn't actually a lawyer
  • Moved into a duplex after a week of learning that painting sucks, but is still better than yellow beige walls that sort of resembled vomit
  • Unpacked
  • Remembered that I did take the bar, I was a lawyer, and that I like money - ergo I should find a job
September
  • Realized that finding a job is really hard
  • Zach started his PhD program
  • Realized I had no friends here and was now utterly alone 8 hours a day
  • Got really depressed
  • Found out I passed the bar. Slightly less depressed for a few days.
October
  • Made myself get out of bed every single day
  • Worked out some days
  • Cried some days
  • Still depressed and now really embarrassed
November
  • Found a job! Huzzah!
  • I'm a secretary making less than I did pre-law school. Huzzah?
  • Alternatively happy that I have a reason to wake-up and depressed at having wasted 3 years and enough money to buy a house. 
  • Still soul crushingly lonely.
December - Now
  • Work
  • Holidays in Oregon
  • More Work
  • Trying to figure out how to be less hopeless, depressed and embarrassed
Whee! What a super-fun year. 

On the plus side, I did remember that I started blogging when I was in DC, feeling alone and sad. As embarrassed as I am with what I'm doing with my life, I miss that little bit of human contact and interaction blogging brings. I miss taking the time to sort out my feelings and get it all out there.

Also,  my current working theory is that an addiction to pinterest and somehow being all crafty and designey, and then putting it on the internet is the path to happiness. It may not be the best theory, but there is so much blog based evidence in support of it!

I have no idea how often I'll be back here. I don't know if I'll write emo posts that remind me of my old livejournal, or post sunny pictures of cute things, or be insightful, or funny or just plain dull. I'll probably just be me, that is after all what I'm best at.