First up, the laziness. I've had an empty $2 frame from IKEA hanging out in my apartments designated black hole, in this case an arm chair stuffed under my desk, for over a year. I've been meaning to put something in and hang in the bathroom, in the hopes that it would make it a little less creepy. I've even had an image saved that I keep meaning to print out and put in the frame which will then be hung in the bathroom for about that long. It's very etsy chic, with a whale assuring me that everything is okay. Andy by etsy chic, I mean its a print being sold on etsy that I somewhat unethically saved a copy of and mean to duplicate using my color printer. I know, I'm not a good person. I also watch pirated tv. Moving on.
Well after a year of meaning to do it latter, latter finally came and I finally decided that there was no reason why I couldn't hit print, take the printed paper, put it in a frame and get that frame onto a wall. Ha. Remember the no skill part?
Putting the paper in the frame was easy enough. Hanging it? Not so much. The frame came with this really long wire and two hooks. I turned that frame around every witch way, trying to find where to put the hooks to attach the wire too before concluding that there were no obvious or unobvious holes to screw the hooks into. So, I improvised and just kind of stuffed the wire into the frame back, popped it on and hoped for the best.
I wasn't sure how long the wire would hold, but I assumed it would probably at least be ok for a few days. If not, hey that's future Genavee's problem. Who cares about her? So, I grabbed our hammer and a few nails left over from assembling various pieces of IKEA furniture and headed in to get this thing hung.
Figuring that anything that is going to be seen primarily by naked people coming in and out of a shower who presumably had better things on their mind than picture placement, I just kind of looked at the wall, choose a spot, held the nail and hit it with the hammer. To my surprise it actually went into the wall fairly easily for a little while. About half way through it had apparently had enough with being cooperative and just felt like hanging out no matter how hard I walloped it. It was fairly clear after a few strokes that the nail was going to win, so I decided to give hanging the picture a try. Unsurprisingly, with the nail poking out so far, the picture stuck out at a very odd and obvious angle. And then fell down.
But I'm a creative girl, and I could solve that problem. If the nail wouldn't go in any farther, I'd just beat the nail until it bent to a more agreeable angle. And so I did. And then I hung the picture again. It looked ok, until I let go, and it swung around for a whil until it settled into an awkward position where it was not only crooked, but also had a corner awkwardly and stubbornly swung away from the wall.
I fought with that thing for minutes, trying everything I could to get it straight. I readjusted the wire, hit the nail some more, placed it softly, tried making it stick with some scotch tape, everything. No matter what I did, the whale was always crooked and mocking me with it's optimism. I finally had enough and shouted as I stormed out":
"Everything is NOT ok, you're crooked, you stupid WHALE."
And then Zach came home, tried very hard to not laugh at my irateness over the whale, figured out that the screws screw directly into the wood, and generally fixed everything. So now our bathroom has a reassuring rather that mocking whale.
One corner still sticks out kind of funny, but in a very subtle, okay kind of way. Hey, the whale just said things would be okay, not perfect.
It looks great!
ReplyDeleteI love this whole story. It is perfect.
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